However, it’s important to clarify something here.  I was counseled to be cautious as I revel in this “rebellion” to remember the warnings of Scripture.

It is in the heart of the definition of what rebellion is that I call myself a rebel.

The key is found in what the heart of our rebellion is based upon.  In 1 Samuel 15:23, the Lord warns those who are rebellious:

For rebellion is as the sin of divination,  and presumption is as iniquity and idolatry.  Because you have rejected the word of the Lord…

I bring up this verse as it was brought up to me, as a caution to all of us rebels.  The basis for our rebellion must be as those who are throwing off a focus on the external, facades, legalism, and “religious-correctness”.   Our rebellion must be against that which is based in man’s failed wisdom and the legalism that results from that.  In no manner am I encouraging us to throw off the Truth of God’s Word, Who He Is, or what He calls us to. 

Legalism:  a dependence on moral law and the development of extra-Biblical rules in which one finds their spiritual confidence and assurance.

Legalism – This is what I rebel against.  This is the lifestyle that so many fellow believers find themselves enslaved to.  This is what I’m calling us from!

As manifested in my upbringing and in those that I know and love, legalism has made its presence known in the addition of extra-Biblical rules including but not limited to strict dress requirements, head coverings for women, Bible translation requirements, limitations on musical instruments and styles, the drinking of any alcohol, the viewing of any movies within a theater, and judgement for those who have differing beliefs.  Within this legalistic view, any straying from those extra-Biblical standards is seen as rebellion.  However, those standards are not found in the heart of the Truth of God’s Word but rooted in man’s fear of failure, the prison of guilt, and a misunderstanding of the character of God and the grace He offers to his children.

This is not a new struggle.  In fact, In Matthew 23, Jesus addresses the Pharisees and their focus on outward demonstrations of “obedience” and their judgment of those who did not follow the rigid standards they had added to the Old Testament Law.

In Galatians 2, we read that Peter leaned towards legalism in his ministry and called some Gentile believers to circumcision (part of the Abrahamic and Mosaic covenants).  This is the same issue that was addressed in Acts 15.  That covenant was fulfilled in the Messianic covenant, the sacrifice of Christ.  Paul confronted him on the addition of an extra-Biblical rule that Peter was saying demonstrated true repentance and belief but which was far from something that Jesus had asked of his disciples.

Colossians 2 is also a wonderful reminder as well of the heart of Grace and the inability to gain any favor with God through the actions we demonstrate:

See to it that no one takes you captive by philosophy and empty deceit, according to human tradition, according to the elemental spirits of the world, and not according to Christ. … And you, who were dead in your trespasses and the uncircumcision of your flesh, God made alive together with him, having forgiven us all our trespasses,  by canceling the record of debt that stood against us with its legal demands. This he set aside, nailing it to the cross. He disarmed the rulers and authorities and put them to open shame, by triumphing over them in him.

He goes on to beg for us to walk in the freedom we have in Christ and not in the “elemental spirits of the world”:

If with Christ you died to the elemental spirits of the world, why, as if you were still alive in the world, do you submit to regulations— “Do not handle, Do not taste, Do not touch” referring to things that all perish as they are used)—according to human precepts and teachings? These have indeed an appearance of wisdom in promoting self-made religion and asceticism and severity to the body, but they are of no value in stopping the indulgence of the flesh.

Grace: God’s unmerited favor.

Grace – This is what I’m relishing in. This is where I’m finding my freedom.  This is what I’m calling us to!  In reading for this declaration, I discovered John MacArthur’s article “What is Grace?”  In fact, from this article, I found an even more beautiful definition of Grace: “the free and benevolent influence of a holy God operating sovereignly in the lives of undeserving sinners.”

It is that understanding of my own state before Holy God, my lack of deserving, my inability to earn any favor before Him that finds me on my face reveling in the beauty that is salvation, the power that is Grace.  It is that gratitude that leads me humbly through my life as I walk, throwing off all illusion that any work of my own might accomplish any manner of favor in His eyes.  It is that gratitude that reads and understands the Love and Mercy He demonstrates continually throughout Scripture, and it is that gratitude that finds me holding fast to a single Truth, that which is clearly stated through passage and principle of the Word.

This understanding removes all guilt, decimates my ability to add my faulty wisdom to the Holy Wisdom of God’s Word by adding extra-Biblical standards, and leaves me singing of His amazing Love.

 There is no fear in love, but perfect love casts out fear. For fear has to do with punishment, and whoever fears has not been perfected in love. (1 John 4:18)

Rejoice with me, my fellow rebels!  For Love has come and because we are now seen through the Righteousness of His Son, there is no fear of punishment.  We are perfected in love.

It has been a sobering question.

Does rebellion fuel my actions?  I have to come a serious and honest understanding that yes, rebellion has found its way into my actions.

Rebellion.  A scary word for someone like myself who has viewed such a severe fight as wrong, who has hated that label for years.  Rebellious.  Rebel.

That is me, if I stop to think and allow myself to understand what it is that I do every day when I wear jeans to church, listen to Maroon 5 or a local pop station, have a glass of wine, or wear a shorter than knee-length skirt.  I’m rebelling.

Yes, I’m a rebel. There I said it.

I’m rebellious.  And proud of it.

I’m rebelling against a focus on the external and focusing on the internal.

I’m rebelling against legalism and embracing Grace.

I’m rebelling against facades and calling for vulnerability.

I’m rebelling against tradition for tradition sake and following Biblical mandates alone.

I’m rebelling against religious-correctness and finding joy in the uncomfortable.

Are you a rebel?

I recently was directed to an article entitled “I’m Sick of Hearing about Your Smoking Hot Wife” published on Christianity Today in which the author attacks pastors and Christian men who publicly praise their “smoking hot” wives, their sex life, and the God-given joys found in marriage.

In this article, the author, a sexual abuse victim, shares how hearing about what a healthy sex life is like makes her bristle because “it’s hard for me to think sex is beautiful. I tend to disconnect from the act”.  She faced raped and molestation as a child and has yet to face freedom from the horrors of those actions.

Bear with me as I wrestle with the grace and patience this poor woman must be offered and the hard truth that she needs to hear.  Know this: I do not speak at a rose-cheeked child unaware of the reality of what abuse of a variety of kinds looks and feels like.  I don’t discuss this as a woman who’s never felt pain or abandonment or a lack of worth.  I don’t minimize the pain of what she and so many others have experienced at the hands of the wretched.  I merely call her and myself to a higher standard than what she has allowed to control her life.

In her article, her first point supporting her “bristling” and “bile in her throat” in response to pastors and husbands who talk about their wives and sex in a positive light is to discuss what she believes “God requires of us” in regards to sex in marriage. (I would like to see her Biblical basis for this statement.)  My heart breaks for her if she has this understanding that sex is a requirement, as in another law or “must-do” or command.  I pity her that she has never experienced within her marriage the sweet oneness that true emotional and physical sexual unity can bring.  Yes, it is understood that if you agreed to get married, sex is a “requirement” but everything in Scripture points to sex as something that should be joyful, relished by both parties, and treasured as something sacred.   The Scriptural understanding of sex as sacred is never demonstrated in the article. (Hebrews 13:4)  She looks at it as a command, a fulfillment of her husband’s needs, and something that she is bound to endure as someone broken, scarred, and festering in pain and unresolved anger and bitterness.

As a result, not only is her view of sex skewed, but her understanding of God has found itself twisted amongst the wreckage of her broken heart.  Overflowing from her comments about the inappropriateness of the church’s view of sexuality and her understanding of sex as something that is required of her and her belief that any requirements made of the married woman in regards to performance for her husband in the bedroom has distorted her understanding of marriage as a whole.  It has thwarted her ability to view marriage as the image of Christ and His Church (Ephesians 5:22-32), as suddenly his needs are pressures and impositions and almost unjust in her mind.  If sex is something God designed to be a requirement in marriage for a woman to “endure”, then what does that say about the character of God?

Her next point is that open communication between spouses is needed in the bedroom.  Absolutely.  I think sex is easier to talk about before marriage than after, as the needs and specificity are more embarrassing post-wedding vows than they should be.  It is the devil’s lie that you can have an “ok” sex life as a married couple and can never reach a point of sexual ecstasy as a couple.  (Does he not try to get us to be satisfied with a lukewarm relationship with the Lord in the same manner?)  Open communication is a must, but her attitude has unfortunately skewed this as well as she only discusses and allows for discussion for her own needs as the injured party.  She does not include any discussion of her husband’s needs and desires and wishes.  The only discussion she expresses that is necessary is that he be willing to hear pain and frustration and realize that “it’s not always so easy to move from ‘This is bad,’ to ‘This is good.’ I was utterly, profoundly petrified of my wedding night. It’s taken me years to move from bad to good.” I’m sorry, sister, but if what you have described as sex as obligation is “good”, I would never want it either.

Her next point is just as one-sided.  She talks about sacrificing for the other person but never addresses her need to deal with her past and her pain and bitterness in order to sacrifice for her husband.  To her, having sex is a sacrifice as she claims she “could make a case for never having sex.” That itself is an extremely unbiblical view, as if her pain or past can justify her withholding satisfaction from the man she vowed to love and give herself to. (1 Corinthians 7:1-5) Not only that, but I would challenge her that the act of sex itself does not necessarily fulfill and satisfy your spouse.  In fact, it is the heart behind the “I gave some; that should be enough” that is the most selfish and appalling.  She demonstrates no real regard for meeting his sexual needs except to go as far as reluctantly “doing the deed”.

Earlier in the discussion and then in her next point, the author discusses another one-side view of the sexual relationship, spousal understanding, and her “holistic view of sex”.  She confronts those who think that if women “struggle in the sexual area and their husbands look elsewhere, it’s partly their fault. They’ve violated that scriptural call to be a smoking hot, sexually satisfying wife.”  While I do not agree that I would be responsible for the heart behind my husband seeking satisfaction outside of marriage, if I were not consciously and actively seeking to meet his needs on a regular basis, I would be responsible for my part in driving him away sexually and provoking him to pursue sexual satisfaction elsewhere. I would liken this argument to the understanding that parents are not responsible for rebellious teenagers, but they are Biblically held responsible for driving them there if they have provoked them. (Eph. 6:4)

In the same way, I would warn her against her emphasis on the view that “Men are gentle, strong, wild, yet not held hostage by sexual urges.”  While I agree with the statement individually, the author has made it so obviously clear that her husband’s needs must yield to her pain and unresolved past.  She holds it against him that he has sexual urges, as if these uncontrolled passions make him another perpetrator against her.  Again, a twisted view of the God-given desires, which are so clearly viewed as beautiful in their correct place —marriage–within Scripture. (Song of Solomon)

She also says that our sexual relationship as a couple must include dignity for each other. She says that we must view each other as “whole people” and therefore we “dignify our God.”  Unfortunately, she is the one with misunderstood view of her own pain and is the self-declared un-whole person.   While I do not know her husband, I dare to say that he has treated her with more dignity and more Christlike patience than she deserves for what she has offered him in return.  If it is possible for sinful man to “dignify” a Holy God, I would say his patience with her one-sided twisted view of sex is acting as quite an example of His Holiness, Patience, and character.

She next discusses her healing.  While I would dare to call this minimal in relationship to what true healing is (and again, I say this as someone who has been broken and needed serious healing as well), I can applaud her desire to heal.  Unfortunately, she has limited herself to agreeing to a sexual relationship and found that as an equality for sexual healing instead of “staying” bitter and refusing sex altogether (I use quotations there because I would dare say she is still bitter).

She finishes up her article by saying that we need to recognize growth, which, while important for any spouse of a sexual abuse victim, is not the end-all for solving this sorrowful dilemma.  The pain of what she experienced was real.  She’s “making progress” but in her mind, there are some things that will never change.  She has limited not only her sexual relationship with her husband but the depth of the healing she could experience and the power of a Holy and Loving God to make broken pasts into beautiful works of artistic mastery.

I am by no means disregarding what she is feeling or thinking that it is possible for a husband to not quite understand the pain which his wife has experienced because of past sexual abuse.  The article is useful for that reason alone.  However, to use this as a fight against another couple’s ability to enjoy and rejoice in a healthy and undamaged sexual relationship is to selfishly impose one’s past on others, to skew what is beautiful and healthy and God-given into something that is required and endured, and to dangerously view God in a way so that He is no longer the Giver of what is good and perfect (James 1:17) but the Designer of something unpleasant and emotionally painful.

It is amazing to me the power of emotions.  One simple suggestion reminds of an unfriendly reality which finds me saddened the current state of things and then frustrated, tearful, restless, discontent.

Is that not the power of a single, uncontrolled thought?  It leads from one single point through a myriad of explainable emotions to create additional thoughts and reveal other yet undiscovered (or just rediscovered) emotions and desires and pain.

When God has called us to take our thoughts captive (2 Corinthians 10:5), I have to believe that He calls us to that because He knows our tendencies, especially as women, to allow one thought to spiral into a deep hole of thoughts that neither glorify Him nor remind us of what’s eternal.

It’s a simple choice, you know, like putting your hands down on the sides of a sled and allowing the friction to bring you to a slow halt.  It’s not always as easy as hitting the power button on our minds and watching the screen of our minds clear.  Sometimes the halt is slower and less than pretty.  Sometimes the tears still come, the struggles still rise up, the temptations still threaten.

The thoughts are captive though.  That’s the beauty of those hands dug in the snow to bring the proverbial sled to a stop.  It might take a decent amount of time, you might lose feeling in your hands or lose a glove, but the decision is made to stop what is out of control, and therein lies the victory.

Today I stuck my hands in the snow.  Victory is sweet.

How I look

My little belly is growing.  It’s more noticeable to other people.  At one point this week, I woke up and felt like it was not really debatable that I have a baby belly. No complaints.  I went through some clothes in my closet and dresser and put them away for post-baby wear, because my belly has started to grow and one thing I detest is stretched out shirts (Just ask my little sister. I was anal about that growing up).

Weight Gain

I had a doctor’s appointment this past Monday.  I ate breakfast before I went and drank about 16 oz of water/juice.  According to their scale, I had gained back the 2 pounds I’d “lost” (I hadn’t lost anything last time.  So, according to them, I’m still at my starting weight, meaning I’ve not gained a pound.  I think maybe I haven’t gained anything since last visit and the eating and drinking that morning helped bump me up where I “needed” to be. Either way, the doctor wasn’t upset with my progress or lack thereof but she did give me a stern “keep eating.”  I am, woman; believe me. I am.  I did a quick measurement on Sunday, and I’ve lost inches on my legs (which seems weird to me) but it’s probably a loss of muscle definition as that was definitely the first body change I noticed.

Food Cravings/Aversions

The past two weeks I have craved nothing but fruit (except have zero interest in apple and oranges) and vegetables.  I must be in need of some additional vitamins.  Other than that, I’m still eating normally, eating a lot, and not really having any noted aversions.  I had been completely grossed out by the smell of Ramen noodles for a few weeks, but that doesn’t seem to bother me anymore.

Baby Size

My baby is now the size of an avocado.  Somehow that seems smaller than an orange to me, but he/she now weighs approximately 3.5 oz and is 4.6 inches long.

Movement

Oh my word!!!!!!! I felt the baby 100% positively this past Sunday.  Adam and I were relaxing on the couch, and I was poking and prodding around my belly, as I find myself doing some times.  I had located the general area where the baby was and was feeling around, when I felt a tiny little ridge area.  I was going to tell Adam to feel there when suddenly, I felt something strange on the inside, and the little person in me moved underneath my fingers.  I can’t even stop smiling when I think about it.  What an amazing miracle of life growing within me.

Boy/Girl

The predictions have begun.  Comment and let me know what gender you think our baby is! I am so excited to find out in 1 month!

Doctor Appointments

We had our 16-week appointment on Monday, and it went well.  The doctor said my blood pressure couldn’t be better, and my little one has a healthy heartbeat between 158 and 161.  

Additional Notes

We’ve officially chosen the “baby’s room”, which has been acting as my workout room.  So what… I’ll be lifting weights next to the crib and changing table. Lol  I’m excited to do some painting and preparation for the baby’s coming.

More Updates to Come!

It’s not set in stone.

picture courtesy of thepregnancyzone.come

Mornings have been harder for me than normal.  I find myself more tired than I “should be”, not being the first to jump out of bed, and as a whole, finding a strange joy in a slower, less stressful morning.  Imagine this… I’m taking the time to get Adam’s lunchbox together, to make him a healthy breakfast that I can drop off on my way to work, I’m eating a healthy breakfast and prepping lunch, and I’m taking time to read the Word and do some additional study reading. Wow.  What a mood changer for the day. Sure, I love my morning runs, but starting off my morning with spiritual priorities in place and without having to literally run around the house in order to leave on-time is so much better for me and my family in the long run.

(I’m sure this schedule will continue to morph until I find the perfect balance between things, but this is how I’m managing my schedule so far during the 2^nd trimester.)

As a result, my workouts happen in the mornings on the weekend and in the evenings during the week.  I’m very excited that the sun has returned and we’re getting to enjoy longer days.  I can come home from work at 5:30, go for a run, and still not be running in the pitch black.

Not being set in stone means taking rest days here and there … and not being frustrated with it.  It’s a huge change for me, but it’s one I’m learning to okay with.

It’s more tiring.

I felt so lame the first trimester.  Running took a whole lot more energy than I expected. After all, I’ve been running faithfully since October 2011. Suddenly, during the first trimester, it was like I had zero iron in my body, and every few steps was a fight. I’ve kept up my mileage (which was just maintaining at 4-4.5 miles) and have allowed myself to run on a more level plain.  My left knee has been tender for the last 4 months, so allowing myself a little ease on the joints for the sake of their longevity just might be my best option.

Realizing my progress.

I’m an over-achiever.  As exercise and health have become more solid passions over the last 4 years, I’m beginning to realize it’s hard to measure my own progress.  What I’m doing never seems quite good enough.  I think I lack confidence that I’m as good as so many others that I admire.  I have my calendar marked for all the days I have worked out during my pregnancy so far in order to help me keep perspective.  I’ve done really well actually.  I’m averaging 4 days a week on a slow week.  That’s ok, right??  I have to laugh because that seems like it’s not enough (I was working out 6 days a week before the baby) but I think know my perspective is skewed.

Maintaining sucks.

I’m competitive.  For those of you who knew me in high school, this is not news.  For those of you who knew me in college, you’ve only known me in competition as it regards to dorm events, and yes, I was competitive then.  However, as I get older, I’m less and less competitive against others and more and more competitive with myself.  I think that’s why running is such a great sport for me.  It’s always about beating my own time, doing better as an individual runner, and growing in my skills as a lifter.  I’m competing against myself.

As a result, I like to have something to train for.  Running the same courses multiple times a week can be ok for a while, but I like to have some reason to push myself hard.  As a result, today I printed out a modified Hal Higdon half-marathon training guide to keep me motivated.  I’m looking for a half that I can run (at an easy pace, of course) around July after 12-13 weeks of faithful training.  Of course, we’ll see how things go.  My health and the health of my baby are the most-important, so I might have to modify as we get further along.

Running is a solace.

I love the peace of a good run.  It’s long been a time of praying, praise, wrestling, and worship for me and the Lord, and when I’m rushed in the morning, that seems to happen less.  My long runs are a great time of praying through the miles, talking to the Lord about family issues, and allowing Him to use my running–the easy miles, the hard miles, the hills, and the pain–to teach me about Himself and about myself.

New running shoes, of course.

I currently have 366.5 miles on the Asic GT-2000‘s I bought in October.  I’m pretty much in love with this pair.  I’ve never had shoes that have been specifically running sneakers 100% of the time and ones that fit me so well.  My rule is I have to run at least 500 miles in a pair of shoes before they can “retire” to act as my everyday shoes.  Well, my everyday shoes are falling apart, and I love how my legs, knees, and feet feel in my GT’s, so I’m excited to be running more faithfully, so I can get the additional 133.5 miles needed on these in order to get a fresh pair (of the same shoe, I’m sure).

A few additional thoughts

I did a lot of research on running while pregnant before I was pregnant, and I’m still doing  a lot of reading, studying, and exploring of different opinions on the topic.  Please do not take my opinions and experience and follow it over your doctor’s.  I am not a trained doctor and am simply sharing from my personal understanding/experience.  Thank you.

Minor Details…. we are in the 2^ndtrimester, and I’m super-excited that I am over 7/20 of the way there. That’s almost halfway!!!  The year is going fast!

How I Look

I don’t feel huge (I think I’m adjusting to my not-so-flat stomach), and my clothes are wearing differently.  I’m still in my normal clothes with a little creativity (hair tie) working for me for the jeans/dress pants. My mother-in-law bought me some awesome maternity shirts that I just can’t wait to wear.

Weight Gain

As of my 12-week appointment, I’d only gained about a pound and a half.  On Sunday, I weighed myself on my in-law’s scale (since I threw mine out ) and I hadn’t gained a pound at all according to theirs.  If I show up next Monday for my appointment and haven’t gained anything else, I’m sure I’ll be in trouble, but it’s not for my lack of eating. lol Ask any of the girls I work with and poor Adam who I text at lunch almost every day telling him that I’m starving (still).

Food Cravings/Aversions

So far, I can’t really say I’ve had the aversions (except sugar).  I can’t really say I’ve had cravings (like I had anticipated cravings anyway).  I more get hungry at random times of the day/night.  I’ll be sitting in bed at 10:30pm, and suddenly decide that a piece of pepperoni pizza sounds amazing.  Then I roll over and go to bed. No desire has been to die for.  Thankfully, I’m back to not craving only carbs, or atleast the carbs that I am desiring include all manner of veggies and fruits (good riddance, first trimester and your craving all manner of empty carbs).

Baby Size

We are now the size of a lemon (for one more day, that is), and I am waiting to see how hungry I am today.  I swear this little bugger does all his/her growing on the last day of the week, because I’m normally ravenous that day!

Boy/Girl

I have no idea.  I will be happy with either. Some friends got us our first sleeper last Sunday.  It’s a blue sleeper with fire trucks all over it.  While it’s definitely “meant” for a boy, my little girl will be growing up around the fire department, so either way, boy or girl, it will be appropriate.  Super-excited to have a baby to put it on!

Dr Appointments

My next doctor appointment is Monday, April 15.  I’ll be almost 16 weeks at that time, and while I won’t be able to have an ultrasound to see my little baby, I look forward to hearing the heartbeat again.

Additional Notes

I found the stroller I want!!! (SideNote: I love Craigslist.)  This really has been the one thing I’m willing to invest in for this baby.  We plan on using an old crib (Adam’s when he was a child) and using a dresser with a bad for a changing table, and I bought maternity clothes secondhand as well.  However, my stroller is the one thing that I’ve wanted to be the best of the best.

The stroller is the BOB Ironman.  It’s meant for long runs and hardcore running, and it retails for $409.00.  Call me crazy, but I plan on running quite a bit with my baby in tow.  I found the stroller I want on Craigslist for $180.  Such a blessing!!

Many of us can recite the qualities of our makeup that make it so great for our look. “Voluminizing” mascara and “pore refining” foundation. Yet few of us take the time to consider what’s in that mascara that is supposed to contribute to greater volume in your lashes or what’s in that foundation that’s supposed to reduce the look of pores on your skin.

The answer is usually not something good. There are dozens of harmful — some would even say toxic — chemicals in makeup and other beauty products that can contribute to an array of health problems (even disease) over time. Here are a few of the most common dangerous items you should be looking out for in makeup:

Phthalates and Parabens

picture courtesy of totalbeauty.com

These are some of the most common chemicals found in makeup, and they are used as preservatives and to keep bacteria out. They are most often found in nail polish, moisturizers, shampoo and perfume. Phthalates and parabens have been linked to breast cancer and reproductive problems. They were banned by the European Union in 2003, but they remain legal in the U.S.

Formaldehyde

Formaldehyde is a known carcinogen, and has also been linked to developmental and reproductive issues.  You won’t likely find “formaldehyde” on the label of your makeup or personal care products. Look instead for ingredients like diazolidinyl urea, imidazolidinyl urea, quarternium-15 and methenamine — some of which break down into formaldehyde in your body. You are most likely to find these ingredients in hair products such as dyes and straighteners, moisturizers, and nail polish.

FD&C Color Pigments

These color pigments are made from coal tar, which is carcinogenic and has been linked to a number of cancers. The FD&C Red #4 pigment has been banned for use in foods because of the problems it has caused in the adrenal glands and bladder. The pigments have also been shown to irritate the skin and decrease oxygen in the blood.

BHA (Butylated Hydroxyanisole) and BHT (Butylated Hydroxytoluene)

Used to prolong the shelf life of cosmetics, BHA and BHT have been linked to a number of problems, including endocrine disruption, liver and kidney problems, and cancer. BHA and BHT have both been listed as chemicals of concern to fish and aquatic wildlife, yet they continue to be used as food preservatives and in cosmetics such as lip stick.

Propylene Glycol

Propylene glycol is found in antifreeze — and in your mascara. Propylene glycol is used to prevent melting and freezing and to extend the shelf life of products. It has been linked to cancer, developmental problems, and reproductive issues. It is also found in nail polish, toothpaste and many other personal care items.

There are many other harmful items found in common cosmetics. It’s worth taking the time to research those long, obscure ingredients listed on the back of your mascara, your foundation, and all your other cosmetics. Learning the ingredients to look out for can help you start to make better choices that will protect your whole health. You can also choose all-natural products or even make your own!

How do you avoid buying makeup that has potentially toxic ingredients such as these? Share your tips in the comments!

About the Author:

Bridget Sandorford is a freelance food and culinary writer, where recently she’s been researching the Pennsylvania culinary institute. In her spare time, she enjoys biking, painting and working on her first cookbook.

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Want to guest post?  - email me at agb_aeb@hotmail.com

I feel great! I am so thankful because my morning sickness has been so minimal.  I really only ever feel nauseated when I’m hungry.  I’m not falling asleep at my desk at work (almost happened –I will admit) and I am not achy/tired all over like I was for a few long weeks.

My energy has returned in the morning, but I am starting off my day a little differently than before.  I’m not running around as stressed before, as I’m spending time reading and studying and praying.  I’m working out in the evening and listening to my body when it needs a rest day.

How I look

Most people would probably still not know that I’m pregnant (actually, most people don’t lol).  The size of my bump changes daily (completely normal) with how much food I have in my stomach, how much rest I’ve had, and how bloated I feel.

Family/Friends

We are telling our closest friends this week/weekend. I have a few more people to tell before, and we’re letting our church know on Sunday.  We’ll wait a week or so more before making it known worldwide.  Then, these will be posted on my blog, so people can catch up with where we are and follow the statistics of our little bean raspberry lime.

On a funny note, Aaron told me that Kendra (his girlfriend) told him he should not only be excited that Adam and I are expecting but that he should tell me.  Yesterday, he told me he was “excited for his or her third birthday!!!!”  Thanks, Aaron. I hope you enjoy this kid while he/she is still a baby too!

Food Cravings/Aversions

I’m trying to eat well (and healthy) and thankfully, my appetite is normal (no crazy cravings…. yet). I’m no longer dying for carbs and am back to desiring salads and healthy foods again (what a relief!).

Sweets are still a definite aversion, and even pickles have lost their charm.  Creamy things sound amazing, and

Baby Size

Last week, my baby was the size of a prune.  Really???  We can come up with anything more creative??  Thankfully, this week he/she is the size of a lime.  That’s so cool.  I handle those semi-regularly.  They’re a decent size, and wow, I have a lime-size baby inside me!

Doctor Appointments

My next doctor appointment is next Friday, a week from today.  Aaaah! I’m so excited to see my baby again!  Adam will be coming with me this time, and I’m so excited for it to become visual for him.  Sure, he knows and he’s excited, but it’s so surreal until you’ve actually seen the baby moving around. I can’t wait!

Boy/Girl

Before I saw the baby in week 8, I was calling my child a girl.  It was weird.  I just kept saying “she”.  Since then, however, all that comes out is “he”.  I was praying as I ran the other day and realized that I was praying for my son to grow to be a Godly man of character.  Then, I had to laugh and say, “make that a Godly woman if she’s a girl, Lord.”  I took some “home tests” by answering some symptom-related questions, and literally, after 12 tests, my “odds” of having a boy versus a girl were exactly even. We’ll see!  8 ½ more weeks or so!  Goodness, that sounds like forever away!

Baby Size: The baby is the size of a large raspberry this week.

Symptoms: Wow, exhausted.  I thought 5 weeks was hard to get out of bed.  Getting out of bed has not been a huge issue this week as much as staying out of bed. Lol I can get up fine, but seriously, by 10:30am, I’m ready for a nap. I’m also really cold!  I know it’s the increased speed of blood circulating through me and the baby, but it’s not fun to feel chilled internally all the time. My face had been doing so well, but I’ve broken out some.  Tea tree oil, here I come. I’ve woken up every night this week around 2:30am with some not-so-fun nausea and cramping.  Waking up nauseous is not pleasant.  However, as long as I’m not hungry during the day, I’m not nauseated.

Cravings: I am not really a fan of anything sweet.  Even tea too sweet kind of grosses me out.  Carbs are still my favorite, but I’m focusing more on eating healthy carbs and less of the kind that I’m really desiring (junk).  I’m thirsty like I’ve been in a dessert.

Mint gum helps with borderline nausea, which is funny since I was expecting that to be repulsive.  Thanks, Karalie, for that tip!

Body Changes: I can say that no one would be able to notice the little pouch I’m beginning to feel except me (or Adam).  We’ve both noticed a little less definition in my abs (although I was happy to see them again after a good run yesterday), and I can totally feel the bloating emphasizing my little growing raspberry.

Additional Comments: Our families all know now. They’re all very excited for us!

Doctor’s Appointments: I get to have my first pre-natal appointment in 2 days, on Friday, February 22!  I can’t wait!